Sunday, December 17, 2006

MULTICULT-Y

Has there been any juicy cult coverage in the news lately? I was just reading a stem cell story on Drudge and reminiscing about all the amazingness that was Brigitte Boissellier, the Raelian doctor who lied about cloning humans. So while other blogs and magazines present their best of 2006 lists, I present my top three cult personalities:


1. Brigitte Boisslier, Raelian doctor extraordinaire - Four years ago, Boisselier announced that she had cloned a bunch of babies to further the Raelian race, an alleged group of 55,000 who believe life on earth started from extraterrestrial DNA. She's my number one not because she lied her ass off but because she actually dared to appear on TV with those teeth and that hair. Hopefully she hasn't cloned herself yet because NOBODY wants to see two of those.


2. Marshall Applewhite, a.k.a. Bo of Heaven's Gate - Now cruising at rocket speed behind the Hale-Bopp comet, Applewhite convinced his 38 followers to lace up their brand new black and white Nike's and kill themselves so they could be transported to the "nearby" spaceship. He also tricked some of the dudes into castrating themselves in preparation for the journey. Damn. I hope they're having fun up their. They made some pretty hot websites in their day.


3. Shoko Asahara, founder of Aum Shinrikyo a.k.a. Aum Supreme Truth - Noticing a trend here? All these cult leaders are SUCH lookers! Asahara and his doomsday cult unleashed poisonous nerve gas in a Tokyo subway station, killing twelve and injuring nearly 1000 people. He also told his followers not to eat oily meats or junk food but was found meditating shortly after the gas attack with deep-friend prawns in his fridge. What the fuck? He's awaiting execution.

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